Do we, millennials, really have it hard? This is the question I’d like to reflect on in today’s post. A bit of a philosophical one if you like, and as politically correct as I can make it be. Although I don’t specifically prefer the term ‘millennial’, and I am quite sure that a good percentage of those of you reading might not be keen on it either, it makes sense that I use it to tell us apart from the generations before and those coming after us, because our situation is truly one of a kind. We were born at a very weird and confusing time in history, landed in a world going through huge, sometimes intimidating changes in all segments of society, and essentially had to hit the ground running and do with what we had. And to start with, I think we had a lot.
Our generation is a privileged generation. Our times have provided us with great access to information coming from all corners of the world; there is just so much for us to process on a daily basis, and to cope with the workload our brains have adapted in their unique way, too. Some of the messages coming our way are about innovation, and success, and new ideas deemed impossible or stupid at some point before, and now made a reality. A lot of positive energy, vision and hope: millennials know better than everyone that anyone can make it.
I find this to be a rather sensitive topic. Of course, I am writing from the perspective of a rather privileged individual: the fact that I have a platform to pour my thoughts on is a privilege in itself. There is no way I can put myself in the shoes of somebody who might struggle to find the resources to make their dreams come true, just because I have had them all my life and used them to get where I am now. Judging from the place I am in now, though, primarily interacting within an academic environment, I feel a lot of hope and desire for progress all around me, and most of my peers want to make things like this happen.
It’s the other side of the coin that I’m very wary of speaking about, the downfall of having information and knowledge at the tip of our fingers at all times. Because we can access this kind of resources, we are less willing to put in the work. We might’ve been given the lemons, but lemonade doesn’t make itself. I found that it is just so easy for my generation to slack off, procrastinate, multitask or put in a smaller amount of work than they would normally, because they know it will do. Or have things done for them. God, that happens so often and it winds me up so much. But no, let’s carry on.
(photo credit: Helena Lopes for Pexels)
Take our parents, tutors and families for example. I am blessed enough to say that I have received the support of my parents in most of my endeavours, could they have been academic, professional or creative: they agreed with every decision I made, and provided as much help as they could while making sure that they didn’t hold my hand too much. Again, I’m aware that this is not globally applicable and I’m speaking from a position of privilege. But looking around me, I found that most of the parents do try to help as much as they can, sometimes too much. Sometimes as far as to make the right choices for us, in our place, like they once did for themselves when times were harder and resources were lacking and their own parents were too busy working to get involved. They want to make sure that we don’t get hurt or lost along the way, like they did when no-one was there to provide support or guidance. Only that my generation has become too reliant on that support and guidance, to the point where they are perfectly happy with their parents or tutors doing everything for them.
Then, you have the people who think they’re the sh*t because of who their parents are and the amount of support and resources they can provide. I can’t begin to explain how much pity I feel for these people: there’s literally nothing sadder than having nothing to show for yourself other than the hard work your parents have done to get you where you are. It’s as silly as someone holding a lemon between their teeth, thinking if they do that for long enough, it’ll magically turn to lemonade, just to go back to the metaphor from earlier. Other than personal preference, though, privilege means nothing if it’s not wisely used to help better a community. And personal value is equal to zero if nothing is done with the resources that one has – no matter how abundant and impressive they are.
I feel as though we, millennials, want a whole lot. We want to follow our dreams and eventually make them come true, we want money, we want to travel, we want to live as good of a lifestyle as possible, we want successful families and successful relationships and successful careers and plenty of leisure pursuits. Most of the time without realising, we want the same things. Is it bad, though? Absolutely not, it makes sense that we aspire to so much and as said before, we nurture hope that the previous generations didn’t dare have. But because we are all aiming for the same peaks, it’s hard not to fall in competition against one another.
Competition is probably the aspect of being a millennial that I personally struggle the most with, and I wish I could just refuse to engage with it but I found that it’s not as easy as saying ‘no’. We are, more or less, raised to compete against each other: in school, in sports, even in the games that we used to play as children. Competition is healthy and exciting, but I do think it’s losing its positive valence once you become an adult. What do adults even compete over? Who has the most successful career, who’s seen the most countries, who gets married and has children first. Who has the most enriched palette of achievements by the age of 30. Who looks best after years have gone by, who wears the most expensive clothes, who lost the most weight. It is so important for us to be the best in everything, or at least do as well as possible but first of all, make sure that people know about it. I brought this up before, coincidentally in my rant about Instagram: why do you think millennials are so enamoured of social media? It is the ideal space to flex about the outstanding life you live, which is, obviously, not worth living if you have no-one to talk to about it.
So do millennials have it hard? Expectations that are being had of us are higher, but we also aim to reach higher than everybody before us. We might struggle to put in the necessary work and discipline, but we are aware of our responsibilities and the potential outcomes. We are happy with all the privileges that come along with it, but we also know everything could go wrong because nothing is guaranteed. Maybe saying that ‘we have it hard’ is inaccurate. Maybe we just go through a set of experiences so different from what our parents and predecessors have gone through before.
I really don’t know anything beyond that, but I guess I’m happy with things staying this way. At least I know what my mission as a millennial really is: work hard with what I have, believe and defy. I am keen on keeping my privilege in check and using it to the best of my ability to do good, and I also want to make sure that I’m not taking myself too seriously in the process. I have faith that I am capable of doing everything that I put my mind up to and I don’t want to stop believing, no matter what goes down. Finally, I want to defy people’s expectations of me. Reach higher than what they’ve thought me capable of doing, do better, be stronger and smarter and faster and more resilient with every experience that I go through. No, mate. No way I’m ever backing down.
I would love to carry the discussion on in the comments section, whether you’re a ‘millennial’ or not. Head there if you want to interact and have a nice chat; that can be done via my social media links, too!
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Photo sources: photo by Helena Lopes, uploaded to Pexels (@helena_wlt on Instagram).